Co-Founders in Hollywood

Co-Founder Jamie and Co-Founder Jenny looking for Matthew Perry

HOLLYWOOD - JAN 14 2020. Theres only one thing the Co Founders like to do besides Ride their hogs, drink their margaritas and beer, count their money and big blocks of gold, rule a Hog empire, and educate others on what its like to be awesome.

That thing is to attend a Rock concert in Hollywood. But you probably already guessed that, right? Probably not. Morons. So its time to tell you readers a little story about how the Co Founders went to a rock show.

Its a Tuesday night in Hollywood and the Co Founders rode their Hogs down to Coffee Bean for their nightly “Matthew Perry Check” where they look for Mr. Perry inside all of the local Coffee Beans in Hollywood. Well, no matthew. But they drank some hot black coffees. They got hyper. When they are hyper that is usually when they decide it is time to Rock. And yes. That happens often. Lucky for them, they have options. Which venue will they attend tonight? Theres always the world famous Whiskey A Go Go. Or will it be the Viper Room? Hell no its haunted with ghosts. Pass. Ok, I think you know where we are going with this. Yup. Rainbow Bar and Grill.

Let’s let you in on a little bit of history. The Rainbow Bar and Grill opened in 1972. Elton John played rock music during their open-ing party bash. John Belushi ate his last meal there. Lentil Soup. Must have been good. According to a source “Notable regulars at the Rainbow in this period include Alice Cooper, Elvis Presley, and Mr. Ringo Starr. Yeah, this sounds a place fit for Hogs.

The Co Founders went to the Rainbow Room like flies to a sticky apple covered in honey. What I am trying to say is... It was just meant to be. They did not check the nightly rock set list because well, why would they. They knew that Rock music would be playing nice and loud and thats how they like it.

When the Co Founders entered the venue they said “Beer . Now.” to the nice and rocking waiter. The waiter gave them a beer and the Co Founders shared it. Next they went inside the venue and liked what they saw. But... no live rock music. Yeah,they were getting pissed off. But it was only 6pm and we all know Rock music starts at mid night.

So... the Co Founders looked around the Rainbow Bar and Grill and found something pretty cool. It was called “The Lair of Hollywood Vampires”. They went inside and checked it out. It was like a tree house inside of the damn Rainbow Bar and Grill. But get this. It was a Hollywood Drinking Club founded by Mr. Alice Cooper. The Co Founders sat in there for 6 hours waiting for the Rock Music to start, all while absorbing the epic ness that is the Lair of Hollywood Vampires.

So, the clock strikes midnight. The Co Founders listen carefully

Co-Founder Jenny and Co-Founder Jamie in the Vampires Lair

for the sound of an electric guitar strumming, or a rocker singing a song. Nothing. They look around and then find some weird guy go up on the stage. He calls himself Scotty Blugrind. Scotty picks up an acoustic guitar and starts singing about non sense in a silly voice. Ok, what the hell is going on now, this is not Rock music. Scotty introduces himself after singing non sense for 10 minutes. Scotty says this is a comedy open mic. Co Founder Jamie starts looking not well. Co Founder Jenny said she looked like she was turning pale and sickly. Co Founder Jamie covers her ears in pain. She says it will be ok. Maybe the Rock music will start soon, she said.

Co Founder Jenny remembers that Co Founder Jamie has sensi- tive ears. But she is honestly starting to laugh her ass off at some of the comedy and forgets all logic. That is until she hears some really loud droplets of liquid hitting the floor. It was so loud the noise surpassed the sound of the Comedy Open Mic. Co Found- er Jenny turns her head to see that Co Founder Jamie’s ears are bleeding. Bad. This cant be good. The volume was too damn high.

Luckily they have Gold Membership to the Hollywood Hospital Branch of FWMPENESCESMNENT Medical Center. The two Co Founders ride off in a protected Hog Escort Caravan with all members of Hollywood Hogs escorting them to the Medical Cen- ter. Kevin Hart (member of HH) tried telling Jamie jokes to cheer her up, but it reminded her too much of the Open Mic and she started to wail. Kevin Hart is no longer a member of Hollywood Hogs after this incident.

Once admitted to the Hollywood Hospital Branch of FWMPE- NESCNEMENET, Jamie was given an experimental ear drum transplant thanks to a Loyal and Generous Deceased Hollywood Hog Member. She was given the ear drums of Frank Sinatra. This surgery was an absolute miracle. Maybe next time she can get a brain implant. Einsteins brain, if we can get our hands on it.